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Self-Coaching Techniques for Managing Fear

by Kate | February 2, 2021

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We’re in unfamiliar territory at the moment. It’s ok if you’re experiencing some fear. Everybody is.

Here are some thoughts about how to manage fear more effectively so it doesn’t manage you:

Normalise it. It’s perfectly normal to feel some fear sometimes if you’re continuing to grow and develop.

How you choose to manage fear is something you can get better at with practice.

Fear doesn’t go away if you ignore it. Avoidance just breeds more fear/anxiety.

Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with an underlying feeling of helplessness.

The way to feel better about yourself and reduce your fear is usually by doing something about it. Informed action wins over paralysis every time.

Take a moment to understand your fear. Is it fear of something that is happening around you? (pandemic) Is it fear about an action you could personally take? (putting yourself forward for a bigger role) Is it fear of feeling a particular emotion? (embarrassment). What else is it?

Take your overall fear, let’s say a ‘fear of a big presentation’, and break it down into smaller chunks – fear the tech won’t work properly, fear you’ll get questions from your audience you can’t answer, fear you’ll forget your key points etc. Now take each of these points in turn and identify what you would do if it actually happened. Now you can be confident you could handle it if you needed to.

Call time on that endless loop of rumination in your head about what you fear (might) happen. Ask yourself some other questions instead.

What is likely to happen? What do you want to happen?

If you were fearless, what would you do?

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